Does money really destroy marriages?

 Posted on April 02, 2020 in Divorce

Does money really lead to that many breakups between spouses? According to the statistics, it’s the second-most common cause of divorce in this country. (Only infidelity causes more marital splits.)

Money woes are, somewhat logically, a big problem for many couples. The bigger the pile of debt that a couple has to manage, the bigger the strain on the marriage. Aside from the stress and frustration of all that debt, couples may find their relationship fraying simply because they have to put all of their energy toward work — just to keep the bills paid. Plus, the subject of money (or debt) may become a couple’s primary topic of conversation — which doesn’t exactly keep a relationship warm.

But debt isn’t the only money trouble that a couple can face. Not talking about money concerns at all is just as destructive to a relationship as talking about money all the time. When couples don’t discuss their financial situation, debts and goals, that can lead to differences in expectations — and create a source of anxiety for one or both parties.

Other money problems are related to deception. If one spouse has a secret spending habit or gambles, for example, that can cause them to hide their expenditures from the other spouse (who may naturally feel betrayed when they find out). Other spouses may be “secret savers,” which can leave their partners feeling equally betrayed — especially if they’ve gone without something important when the money was hidden away.

A healthy marriage takes work — but all the effort in the world sometimes can’t overcome all of the obstacles you can face if you and your spouse are simply mismatched. If you’re contemplating divorce, find out more about your legal options.