Se Habla Español
facebook linkedin youtube

Take a second to think about the moment in which you and your spouse first got engaged. It was likely a time full of joy, and perhaps one of the happiest moments of your life. At this time, you probably envisioned your relationship in the future to be a story of “happily ever after,” and it’s possible that you could never have even entertained the possibility of ever falling out of love with them.

This is a treasured memory that many married couples have, but it’s often the case that this love and elation fades over time. While some couples manage to successfully transition from the honeymoon period to happy married life in the long term, others do face hurdles. If you are at a point in your marriage in which you are struggling to understand how the two of you fell in love in the first place, you may be committed to trying to make the marriage work even though you are not sure how. The following is an overview of some tips for improving an unhappy marriage.

Make an effort to spend quality time together

One of the biggest reasons why couples have problems in their marriage is because they simply don’t have time to invest in each other. If work, the children, and other commitments come before your relationship with your spouse, it’s likely that you will encounter problems at some point or another. Try tospend one hour of quality timetogether each week at least.


Divorce is a common experience, but that doesn’t mean that the average person really understands what a Texas divorce involves. In fact, divorce’s commonness has led to a proliferation of urban legends and myths surrounding the divorce process.

Some of what you hear may be accurate in another state. Other times, it may have been true years ago but has changed due to changes in the law. Some claims simply have no basis in reality whatsoever. When you understand the truth of the five myths listed below, you may feel less nervous about moving forward with a divorce.

Myth #1: You have to blame everything on your spouse


Being the parent with primary custody means that you have responsibility for all of your children’s basic needs. The child support you receive helps you keep a roof over the children’s heads. It helps pay for the groceries and cover the costs of your utilities so that everyone is safe and comfortable at your home.

Realistically, child support probably doesn’t cover the full cost of those basic needs, let alone the additional expenses that come with having kids like replacement backpacks after someone throws up in one or unexpected orthodontia.

The child support that you do receive will likely play a crucial role in your ability to balance your budget every month as the custodial parent. It can be difficult to be financially dependent on someone else. If your ex loses or quits their job, can they just stop paying child support to you?


Personality disorders are deeply rooted patterns of behavior that somehow diverged from how the average person behaves. Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a relatively common condition.

Those with NPD may use others to get what they want. They also probably have a massively inflated sense of self-importance. They generally feel like they can do no wrong and that the world owes them something.

Narcissists are often very manipulative and good at controlling what they show to others. It may have taken many years of marriage before you started to see the signs of your spouse’s NPD. Whether they have a formal diagnosis or a vicarious diagnosis through your therapist or similar professional, their condition will impact what your divorce will be like for you.


Stress can do a pretty big number on your immune system — and that’s bad news if you’re going through a divorce. Studies have shown that the more stressful a divorce ends up being, the more likely it is that the participants will end up sick.

Simply put, the human adrenal system is designed to cope with short bursts of stress — not the kind of daily grind that comes with a long, difficult divorce. That kind of stress gradually triggers problems with your cortisol levels and makes it harder to stay healthy. How do you cope? Here are some suggestions from the experts:

  1. Eliminate as many unknowns as possible. You can cope better with your situation and your future when you know what to expect. Find out everything you can about the divorce process and your rights as early as possible.
  2. Be willing to accept life on life’s terms. You may not like what’s happening, but you can’t change it. You need to accept that your life did not take the path you anticipated and start moving forward on the new path.
  3. Eat right, sleep right and exercise. It may sound trite, but these three things really do contribute greatly to your overall well-being and health, both mentally and physically.
  4. Know your goals and keep them in mind. If your primary goal is to get out of a bad marriage as quickly as possible, you may be able to take a very different approach to your divorce, for example, than someone who is worried about their financial stability and issues like spousal support and marital assets.

Finally, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Whether it’s your attorney, a parent, your siblings or your friends, find the people you can rely on and let them know what you need.

Back to Top